Tips On Motivating and Working with Entitled Players

As a coach, few things are more frustrating than watching talented players cruise through practice while their teammates grind for every improvement. You see the potential, you know what they’re capable of, but something is missing—that inner drive, that intensity that separates good players from great ones.

At our summer workouts, the contrast is stark. Some players arrive with a purpose, attack every drill, and leave everything on the court. Their improvement is visible week after week. Meanwhile, their teammates watch in amazement, convinced these players just “got lucky” with natural talent. But we coaches know better. There’s no luck involved—just countless hours of deliberate, uncomfortable work that happens when nobody’s watching.

The real challenge isn’t coaching the motivated players. It’s cracking the code with those who seem content with mediocrity, who respond to your push for excellence with phrases like “this sport is my safe place” or “I work hard.” These responses reveal a fundamental misunderstanding of what growth actually requires.

Redefining the “Safe Space” in Sports

When players talk about sports being their “safe place,” they often mean it’s where they feel comfortable and unchallenged. But this completely misses the point of what athletic development should provide. Yes, sports should offer a safe environment—physically and mentally—but that safety should enable risk-taking, not prevent it.

A truly safe sporting environment is one where players can:

• • Make mistakes without fear of personal attack
  • Push their limits without risking injury
  • Express themselves authentically while being held accountable
  • Face adversity with support but not rescue

What it’s not is a place where players avoid discomfort, pressure, or challenge. The greatest lessons sports teaches us come from navigating difficulty: playing through adversity, performing under pressure, staying composed when things go wrong, and bouncing back from failure.

Recently, one of my players told me she had “lost confidence in herself.” As a coach, this was hard to hear, but it also revealed something important. I had to ask her directly: “What are you doing to create uncomfortable, pressure-filled training outside of our practices?” Her silence told me everything I needed to know.

Confidence isn’t built in comfort zones. It’s forged in the fire of repeated exposure to challenging situations where you learn to trust your preparation and ability to adapt.

The Three-Part Solution for Motivating Low-Intensity Players

1. Make the Invisible Work Visible

Those “lucky” players your team admires aren’t just working harder—they’re working smarter and with different intentions. Their teammates see the results but miss the process. Create opportunities to illuminate what real preparation looks like.

Have your driven players share not just their training routines, but their mindset during difficult moments. Let the team hear things like: “When I’m struggling with a drill, I focus on what I can learn from each rep” or “I actually get excited when practice gets hard because I know that’s where real growth happens.”

Consider implementing practice journals where players reflect on their mental approach, not just their performance statistics. When less motivated players see the thought processes of their driven teammates, it often creates breakthrough moments about what they’ve been missing.

2. Connect Individual Choices to Team Consequences

Players who avoid intensity often don’t realize how their personal comfort zones impact the entire team. Make this connection explicit without being harsh about it.

When you choose to stay comfortable in practice, you’re not just limiting your own potential—you’re limiting what this team can achieve together. Your teammates are counting on you to be ready when the game gets difficult.”

Paint specific scenarios: “If you’re not comfortable being uncomfortable in practice, what happens when we’re trailing by one point with thirty seconds left? What happens when the opposing team goes on a run and the pressure mounts?”

Help them understand that their role on the team might be different from what they initially envisioned—not because they lack talent, but because they haven’t developed the mental toughness required for crucial moments.

3. Challenge Their Definition of “Hard Work”

Many players genuinely believe they’re working hard because they show up and go through the motions. This requires a fundamental shift in how they d

4. Define effort and intensity.

Ask pointed questions: “What does ‘working hard’ mean to you? Can you give me three specific examples from this week where you chose to do something difficult when you could have taken an easier path?”

Create training situations where the effort level isn’t sufficient. Design drills that require mental engagement, not just physical participation. When they inevitably struggle, frame it as valuable data: “This is exactly what we need to work on—not just your physical skills, but your ability to think and execute under pressure.”

The Entitlement Question

Are these players entitled? Perhaps, but the label matters less than the solution. Some players have been conditioned to expect praise for minimal effort. Others have never learned what real intensity looks like. Still others are protecting themselves from the vulnerability that comes with genuine effort—if you don’t try your hardest, you can’t truly fail. Whatever the underlying cause, the approach remains the same: create an environment where excellence is the standard, not the exception. Where comfort is the enemy of growth, and where every player understands that their individual choices ripple through the entire team.

What You Can Control

You can’t force motivation, but you can create conditions where motivation becomes necessary. You can’t guarantee that every player will embrace intensity, but you can ensure they understand exactly what choosing comfort over growth means for their role on the team.

The most important conversation you can have with these players isn’t about working harder—it’s about working differently. It’s about helping them see that the path to genuine confidence runs directly through the uncomfortable territory they’ve been avoiding.

Sometimes the most motivating thing you can do is hold up a mirror and let players see the choice they’re actually making. Not between success and failure, but between growth and stagnation, between being a contributor and being a passenger, between earning their place and simply occupying it.

The players who make this shift often become your most valuable teammates—not because they were naturally gifted, but because they learned to embrace the discomfort that creates real strength. And that transformation, when it happens, is worth every moment of frustration it took to get there.

About the Author:

Amy Masters is a proud sports mom, seasoned coach, and dedicated club administrator with over a decade of experience in youth athletics. She launched Jr Lions Field Hockey in Hunterdon County, growing it from just 40 players in its first season to over 150 by year three. Fueled by the growing passion and competitive spirit of local athletes, she went on to found Omega Field Hockey Club, now serving players across New Jersey and Pennsylvania.

A former collegiate athlete herself, Amy played field hockey at Lock Haven University, where her love for the game truly took root. Off the field (and somehow still finding time), she leads marketing for iSport360 and co-edits the Youth Sports Survival Guide—the largest youth sports newsletter in the world.